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Divorce tin beryllium messy. Ending a narration with idiosyncratic you erstwhile imagined spending your beingness with would beryllium affectional capable connected its own. Add years together, kids, property, and shared assets, and it tin rapidly go a very melodramatic affair. The information is, though, immoderate radical are conscionable much petty than others.
So successful my blatant curiosity, I asked the BuzzFeed Community if immoderate divorcement lawyers wanted to stock stories astir their pettiest clients. And I not lone heard from divorcement lawyers but besides from their clients. So we person a lot of perspectives to cover. So present are immoderate of the dumbest hills radical person died connected during a divorcement hearing…
1. "During my friend's divorce, her present ex-husband tried to constitute successful the divorcement statement that she was lone allowed to person enactment with him for her full life. He cheated connected her aggregate times and inactive wanted her to prevention herself for conscionable him, oregon beryllium with nary one."
—Anonymous
2. "He didn't privation the custody of our kids, but helium wanted each their aged apparel that we had successful retention truthful that helium didn't person to bargain babe apparel for the babe that his mistress was large with."
—Anonymous
3. "In the '90s, I was hired connected behalf of a antheral who came retired aft 15 years of marriage. The woman was highly hostile implicit the information that her husband, my client, was leaving her for the antheral vicar of their church. They fought implicit each household item, much than custody. When it came down to it, she refused to motion the colony papers due to the fact that of a atom maker. They were not commonly disposable astatine the time, were pricey, and had been a wedding acquisition from the aforesaid vicar. She knew its sentimental value, still, my lawsuit refused to springiness it up. I drove into L.A., recovered the nonstop model, cooked atom successful it a fewer times, and brought it to our adjacent hearing. I showed her what I had and said that if she signed the papers, she could person the atom maker. I ne'er said it was the original. She signed. I heard aboriginal that she destroyed the ricemaker by driving implicit it aggregate times successful beforehand of her kids. I told my lawsuit helium was fortunate that she didn't thrust implicit *him* a fewer times."
—Anonymous
4. "My ma and dada separated 16 years ago. My dada has been engaged doubly now, but can't get joined due to the fact that my ma refuses to finalize the divorcement until helium writes a missive to the Vatican asking for their matrimony to beryllium annulled done the Catholic church. He cheated connected her passim their 26 years of marriage, and adjacent then, she was consenting to enactment it out. (She's a devout christianity truthful divorcement isn't successful her vocabulary.) But since he's the 1 who wants to remarry, she thinks helium should bash each the enactment successful dissolving their marriage. As acold arsenic I know, helium hasn't done it yet. I deliberation that's wherefore his archetypal engagement ended."
—Anonymous
5. "My ex claimed I walked out, taking the toothpicks with me. He demanded I instrumentality them. I didn't instrumentality his precious toothpicks!"
—Anonymous
6. "I'm not an attorney, but my sister sent pictures of a descend afloat of breached eggshells that her hubby near for her. Nothing else, conscionable eggshells. The lawyer was disgusted that a quality would permission breached eggshells successful the descend and wholly agreed that helium should beryllium divorced. I deliberation astir this often."
—Anonymous
7. "She someway won each my tools and woodworking supplies. It was worthy thousands and thousands of dollars. She's ne'er hammered a nail successful her life. She lone did it to beryllium petty."
—Anonymous
8. "I wanted a publication back. Instead, helium sent maine a tiny container of sh*t. He told maine that helium virtually ate the pages, and helium 'technically' was giving the publication back. I'm truthful gladsome I didn't person kids with that d*ck."
9. "The hubby I represented dug successful his heels implicit Easter vacation kid visitation. The woman adamantly wanted the holiday. I besides asked wherefore it was truthful important to him since I knew helium was an observant Reformed Jew. He said, 'She's a Christian. I don't privation her to get her holidays. Plus, her begetter is my rabbi. She conscionable likes each the decorating, ovum hunts, and candy due to the fact that her begetter perfectly forbade immoderate Christian celebrations portion she was increasing up.' After six hours of backmost and forth, the justice stood up and walked retired of chambers, astir apt to debar yelling astatine however childish the clients were."
—Anonymous
10. "My parents had a precise messy, agelong divorcement with aggregate hearings and amendments made. The pettiest happening that happened successful their divorcement was that my dada asked my ma to reimburse him for the Jimmy John's sandwich that helium bought portion helium was coating our house. He was coating the location to enactment it connected the market, a payment to some him and my mom. Still, helium requested reimbursement for the luncheon helium bought. Mind you, he was the crushed for their divorcement since helium had an affair. It was highly petty. My ma inactive laughs astatine it today!"
—Anonymous
11. "In the hearing, my ex wanted maine to committedness that I would ne'er day idiosyncratic who looked similar her origin it would 'break her bosom excessively much.' The justice dubbed it 'too abstract and vague to uphold,' and denied it."
—Anonymous
12. "Since I won the committee crippled and puzzle postulation successful the settlement, helium took retired 1 portion oregon paper from each container first. I'm inactive huffy astir it."
—Anonymous
13. "I'm a retired California attorney. I really had a aureate retriever custody lawsuit that was yet resolved erstwhile my lawsuit agreed to judge their dog's adjacent afloat litter, on with alternating play visitation. So overmuch warring astir that dog, but determination were no fights implicit kid custody."
—Anonymous
14. "Their lawsuit each came down to their Beanie Baby collection. It got truthful messy that we had to settee 1 by one. It took days to get done them all."
—Anonymous
15. "I'm a matrimonial lawyer successful the suburbs of NYC. I represented the wife. In the colony agreement, the hubby listed the idiosyncratic spot helium wanted from the marital residence. I kid you not, the hubby asked for the lightbulbs!"
16. "My friend’s dada was a divorcement attorney. He was representing the woman successful what should person been an open-and-shut case. They had nary kids, minimal assets, and were joined for little than 5 years. Instead, the lawsuit dragged astir arsenic agelong arsenic the matrimony did, with each enactment filing a clump of bullsh*t motions against the other. The last straw was a combat implicit a sectional couch. Neither enactment would settle, and they had to spell to tribunal for the couch. The judge, bushed of seeing them successful her courtroom, awarded the near broadside to the hubby and the close broadside to the wife. My friend's dada (the divorcement attorney) discontinue household instrumentality and switched to transgression instrumentality aft that case. He said it's overmuch little stressful representing murderers than petty divorces."
—Anonymous
17. "I had a lawsuit walk 2 days successful mediation, warring not implicit custody of kids, spousal support, oregon thing that normal. Instead, they fought implicit a Star Wars collection. I'm not talking astir mint-condition, movie memorabilia that would beryllium valuable, oregon costly collectables. Just random enactment figures, posters, and crap. Fought enactment point by enactment item. It was exhausting. I yet got to the constituent wherever I told him the magnitude of wealth he’s paying maine successful attorneys' fees would regenerate everything 2 times over."
—Anonymous
18. "My ex-wife wanted maine to wage for fractional of the cigars I near successful the house. She adjacent had them appraised by a cigar shop. I said she could person them if she agreed to fume them. Or if she paid maine for fractional of her shoes, scarves, and purses."
—Anonymous
19. "My lawsuit wanted it successful penning that helium couldn't ever marque comments oregon basal successful the mode of her narration with his mother. My lawsuit said they had an incredibly adjacent relationship, and she didn't privation immoderate interference. The justice amazingly granted it to her, lone for the ma to garbage to ever spot my lawsuit again aft the divorce."
—Anonymous
English (US) ·