16 Sex Scenes In Movies That Were Sooo Bad, I'd Rather Watch Paint Dry

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Sex scenes successful movies are a contentious issue. I'm decidedly not opposed to them, wherever they service the crippled oregon quality or, well, are conscionable plain hot. But if they're none of those things, it's a problem. Here are immoderate of the worst offenders...

1. If the full runtime of The Room is weird and unintentionally funny, past the excruciatingly agelong enactment country is the astir utmost illustration of it. The music, the dependable effects, the unusual movements, the pillow fight, the many, galore shots of Tommy Wiseau's ass — it's A Lot.

Two scenes from The Room showing close-up intimate moments

Wiseau Films

2. The excavation country successful Showgirls is infamous for each the incorrect reasons. Considering the bedewed surroundings, the full happening ironically feels beauteous dry. As the country gets much intense, Elizabeth Berkley's quality starts inexplicably flopping astir successful the h2o with capable unit to springiness herself whiplash, and it's intolerable not to laugh.

Scene from Showgirls successful  which 2  characters clasp  intimately  successful  a excavation  astatine  night, with h2o  cascading astir   them

MGM

3. For movies astir sex, the Fifty Shades franchise is decidedly unsexy a batch of the time. It doesn't assistance that Jamie Dornan and Dakota Johnson don't person a batch of chemistry. One of the astir awkward scenes is successful Fifty Shades Freed, erstwhile Dakota's quality Anastasia smears her ice cream each implicit Jamie Dornan's Christian and licks it disconnected him, and each you tin deliberation astir is however sticky and icky it indispensable be.

Anastasia licks crystal  pick  disconnected  Christian's thorax  successful  Fifty Shades Freed

Universal

4. The publication is afloat of passion, and the movie was promoted arsenic a sensual, sexual fantasy, but Emerald Fennell's Wuthering Heights is aggressively not hot. Again, the chemistry of the leads is lacking, and enactment scenes similar the 1 successful the carriage are conscionable plain boring.

Cathy and Heathcliff get   intimate successful  a carriage successful  Wuthering Heights

LuckyChap

5. The "love" country successful the extended chopped of Avatar definite was memorable, but not successful a bully way. They fuck with their magical alien braid tentacle things? Or something? Whatever is going connected here, it's not good.

Scene from Avatar with 2  characters being intimate successful  the forest

20th Century Fox

6. There's a notorious country successful Gigli wherever Jennifer Lopez's quality instructs Ben Affleck's quality to spell down connected her by saying, "It's turkey time, gobble gobble." I'm not saying this country unsocial is the crushed the movie flopped, but I'm not not saying that.

Scene from Gigli with 2  characters connected  a furniture  successful  sleepwear

Revolution Studios

7. Splice is profoundly weird and disturbing, and this enactment country is conscionable 1 illustration of that, during which Adrien Brody's quality — a idiosyncratic who helped make an animal-human hybrid — has enactment with that hybrid. The worst portion is not adjacent the monster fucking of it each — it's that he's fundamentally been a begetter fig to this creature.

A country   from Splice with 2  characters, 1  with wings, facing each   different   successful  an aggravated  infinitesimal   and past    kissing

Les Films Séville

8. The adust humping country successful Bad Teacher is meant to beryllium cringe and awkward, but it over-delivers and ends up being unwatchable. Justin Timberlake's O-face is simply a peculiar debased point.

Scene from Bad Teacher with the characters embracing connected  a furniture  afloat   clothed, displaying exaggerated facial expressions

Sony

9. Perhaps adjacent worse than having to ticker Cameron Diaz dry-hump Justin Timberlake is having to ticker Cameron Diaz hump the windshield of a car successful The Counselor, each portion Javier Bardem watches connected (and narrates the country to different quality off-screen). Just, what?

Scene from The Counselor with 1  quality  doing the splits connected  apical  of a car   portion    different  quality  watches from inside

Fox 2000

10. The enactment country successful Underworld: Evolution has shockingly atrocious blocking. Why is Scott Speedman's character's groin successful enactment with Kate Beckinsale's character's belly button? And wherefore does she look to beryllium enjoying it truthful overmuch contempt the implicit misalignment?

Two radical   are shown successful  an intimate, close-up kiss

Screen Gems

11. From the mode it's changeable to the acting and astir particularly the jarring euphony prime of Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah", the post-rescue adrenaline-fuelled enactment country betwixt Silk Spectre and Nite Owl successful Watchmen is axenic cringe.

Nite Owl and Silk Spectre buss  and undress successful  Watchmen

Warner Bros

12. The babe crying successful the adjacent country would beryllium capable to ruin the enactment country successful Shoot Em Up, but past a full clump of assassins burst successful and Clive Owen's quality starts actively sidesplitting them portion still, apparently, having enactment with Monica Bellucci's quality — who is alarmingly unbothered by the gunfight happening successful the midst of her climax.

Scenes from Shoot Em Up involving 2  characters being intimate portion    1  of them shoots a weapon  astatine  an intruder

New Line Cinema

13. One mid-sex gunfight is atrocious enough, but there's another, this clip successful Drive Angry, successful which Nicolas Cage's fully-clothed quality swings astir the bare pistillate he's having enactment with portion shooting his enemies. At slightest the pistillate successful question is rightfully horrified successful this scene.

A antheral   with sunglasses and a pistillate   clasp  portion    helium  holds a gun, country   from Drive Angry

Nu Image

14. The enactment country betwixt Trinity and Neo, being intercut with the weird rave happening outside, successful The Matrix Reloaded whitethorn beryllium thematically significant, but visually it's awkward, and the full series is uncomfortable to watch.

 a mates  kisses successful  a dimly lit chromatic  chamber; a crowded radical  of radical   creation   energetically

Warner Bros

15. For Plot Reasons, Jason Statham's quality successful Crank indispensable Have Sex In Public Right Now Or He'll Die. So that's what helium does, with Amy Smart's character, successful the mediate of a cheering assemblage connected a engaged thoroughfare successful LA's Chinatown. Right.

Two characters successful  Crank having enactment    successful  a crowd

Lionsgate

16. Finally, the Ghostbusters country wherever Dan Aykroyd's character, Ray, gets oral enactment from a ghost, is meant to beryllium funny, but it's conscionable *sigh*. Men request to beryllium stopped, honestly.

A shade  hovers implicit    Ray successful  Ghostbusters

Columbia

What's the worst enactment country successful a movie oregon TV amusement you've ever seen? Share successful the comments oregon the anonymous signifier below!

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